Ran Meets His Boyfriend's Boss
by Idimmu
Summary: A pointless little thing I wrote. Beware of the BradxRan-ness of it! Worth the read!


The Pointless Piece of Crap aka Ran Meets his Boyfriend's Boss  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them, it would be quite scary if I did...  
  
This is what happens when I'm hyper and watch Weiss, be afraid...  
  
And it's BradxRan/RanxBrad, not exactly a favorite of mine, but necessary to the story.  
  
AU  
  
  
  
**********  
  
  
  
Once upon a time, there were two boys who loved each other very much. The younger of the two was a red-headed florist named Ran Fujimiya, whose likes were limited to: money, his sister, his boyfriend, death glares, and killing people. The older was a guy who could see the future, his name was Brad Crawford, and his likes were limited to: money, his boyfriend, death glares, and killing people. Quite a lot of time was spent at each other's houses, doing various things...  
  
#*#*CENSORED*#*#  
  
Ahem!...That would be a *different* story!  
  
Anyways, they knew everything about each other except one thing: Who they worked for. That would soon change though, as there was an Esset office party coming up soon, and Takatori Reiji was anxious to meet 'the love of Crawford's life', as the American had put it. Crawford was his best assasin, and like a son to him. Far more than the estranged one with the odd hair that one of his mistresses had taken away from him. He had her and her husband killed a little while ago, though.  
  
So, a week before the day of the party, Crawford, as he preferred to be called...unless of course it was Ran during the throes of passion, when he preferred the moaned, "...oohh! Braaaad!!!!"  
  
Getting back to the story, Crawford walked up to his favourite red-head (Schuldich didn't count, his hair wasn't naturally red) and asked, "Ran, would you be my date for the Es- I mean, for my office's party?" and waited for the answer. Of course, he really didn't have to, since he knew that Ran would say yes, but he waited anyway. 'Good thing I caught myself before I said Esset, I wouldn't want him to know I am a hired assasin just yet', he thought to himself, right as Ran answered him.  
  
"Of course I'll come with you, only if you come to the Krite- I mean, the Koneko's shop party in two weeks." Ran was very glad he had caught himself just before he said Kritiker, 'I don't want him to know that I am a hired assasin just yet'.  
  
An affirmitive nod from Crawford and they continued to thier favourite activity in Ran's empty house.  
  
#*#*CENSORED*#*#  
  
So you see, the two boys were faced with the same dilemma, they just didn't know that they were hiding the same thing from one another, not just yet anyway.  
  
#One Week Later (at the Esset Party)#  
  
Crawford and Ran were having a good time just mingling with the guests, even though he could swear he recognize some of them. The large banner that stated 'Esset' seemed to register in his mind somewhere as well, but he couldn't think about it all that well, with Crawford's hand massaging his *very* lower back, that is, he couldn't think about anything except the hotel he saw across the street, with the king-sized beds advertised on the sign.  
  
"Helloooooo!!!! Crawford!" An annoying voice filled his ears as a blue- haired chibi glomped him. Tot was bouncing around, obviously she had just had sugar and caffiene. His hand stopped massaging Ran's back as he pryed off the annoying little umbrella freak from the glomp of death she had him in.  
  
Ran's senses slowly started to come back to him, and slowly began to put two and two together...he got twenty-two once the hand was replaced and the blue-haired girl bounced away to get more sugar.  
  
"I'll introduce you to my boss now, he wants to meet you." Crawford told him, as he steered them towards the executive table. Meanwhile, Takatori Reiji got up from the table to greet Crawford and his date personally. "Ran, this is my boss, Mr.Takatori Reiji. He is the leader of a hired assasin organization called Esset, of which I am very high up in."  
  
Again, Ran put two and two together...this time he got four. He exploded into a blood rage as he recognized the man who had had his parents killed. "TAKATORI!!!!!!!!!!! SHI-NE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ran began to slash his katana at the man, before he realized that he didn't even bring his katana with him. A strange voice that didn't belong there entered his mind at that point, ::Ran, calm down:: "Schwartz!"  
  
Crawford, at that point, also put two and two together...getting four. "Weiss!"  
  
Takatori Reiji put two and two together as well...and got four as Schuldich, Crawford, and Ran had a glaring competition. "Son!" He yelled out.  
  
"WHAT!!!!!!" Exclaimed the three men, interrupting the silent contest.  
  
(AN:imagine Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker here if you will)  
  
"Ran, I am your father."  
  
At this point, Crawford and Ran simutaiosly passed out, ending up in a compromising position on the floor. Seeing this, Schuldich snickered and ran out of the room to get a camera.  
  
The End  
  
Epilogue  
  
Nagi killed Tot, and is currently in an undisclosed location.  
  
Farferello, who had no part in this, is licking his knives.  
  
Ken is wondering why Ran doesn't love him, and why he wasn't in the story.  
  
Omi is in an undisclosed location.*cough*Nagi*cough*  
  
Schuldich got sidetracked on his quest for a camera, and is currently in above hotel with another assasin that wears sunglasses.*cough*Yohji*cough*  
  
Yohji is...see above.  
  
Ran and Crawford lived happily ever after, once Ran killed Takatori and Crawford joined Weiss, that is.  
  
**********  
  
Well, there is my first published Weiss fic. I can't really believe I wrote something like that though. Please review! The pretty purple button is there for a reason: authoress' ego boosting! 


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